Romantic Tips for Couples
1. Just Spend Time Together.
Take a break from the holiday bustle to give each other a little special attention. Spend some evenings at home before the fire or hold hands while you take a long walk through the freshly fallen snow. Netflix and Chill is a good way to enjoy the time. Offer your partner a foot massage.
Cuffing?
If you are cuffing your can still make it fun and special for the one that you are cuffed with. Your cuffed relationship may or may not work out come the spring, but for now, make the best of your situation and keep it light, entertaining and fun.
2. Create Some Of Your Own Special Rituals.
Invent your own holiday traditions. Make a tree ornament each year and watch your collection grow over time. Watch an annual marathon of holiday movies and TV specials served up with eggnog and toasted nuts.
Write each other a letter or make a video letter of the things that you love and appreciate about each other. You can tell them how you felt the first time that you met, about how you nervous you were before your first date, on your wedding night, or when each of your children were born.
3. (For a change?) Be Nice To Your In-Laws.
Earn some brownie points by being a little kinder to your partner’s family. Offer to help with some of their holiday chores. Encourage your kids to make crafts that they can give to their grandparents or set up a special outing for them if they live nearby. Have the kids make their own video holiday letter to grandma and grandpa. Having the kids meet with their grandparents on Zoom is nice, but giving them a video that they can replay over and over again and show off to their friends is a great gift for them.
4. Exchange Meaningful Gifts.
For example, if you honeymooned in Paris, give each other tickets for a return trip with reservations at the same hotel (at least make plans for the return trip). For the years you can’t get away, pick up a special bottle of French wine and any special foods that you had on your honeymoon.
Get some of those digital photos that you have stashed away on your hard drive or cell phone printed and put together a good old-fashioned photo album to give to your partner.
5. Extend Your Hospitality.
Your relationship will grow stronger from sharing your blessings with others. If you can, invite your neighbors over for brunch. Have an open Zoom call that people can drop into throughout the day or at other times during the holiday. Set regular times on different days so that people can still join in when they have time, or again and again, if they like.
Donate some books to a senior center and volunteer to read them aloud.
6. Reminisce And Plan Ahead.
Look back and remind yourself of all of your happy memories. Share with each other the qualities you value in each other (make and get that video shared!). Go through the old photo albums you have – From before you had your kids and after. Watch your wedding video again (for the second time?) Watch any other special videos that you have.
Set goals for the future like figuring out what to plant in the garden come spring – rose bushes or vegetables? What will be when your kids go off to school or move out on their own?
7. Together, Stay Physically Fit.
Keep your love life strong by taking care of each other. Avoid holiday weight gain and exercise each day. Do some yoga together. Take those walks. Manage the stress with physical activity and make sure that you both stick to a regular sleep schedule. Set a home workout plan that you can both do and do some of those activities together.
If you do any one of the things (or more!) from the list above and do it well, we are sure that romantic heat will be turned up a bit in your life. The weather outside may be frightful, but inside you’ll be all warm and cozy.
Romantic Tips for Singles
Romantic tips for singles? No, we are not talking about dimming the lights, playing romantic music and switching hands. If you are single and looking for romance for the New Year, or if you have just started dating someone, there are things that you can do that can make the holidays a little warmer and smoother for you to get through.
So that you know, most of what is below is about you and not specifically about anyone else. Any change that you want to make or improve in your life, starts with you.
We know. You have heard it a thousand times already: “If it is to be, it is up to me”. Consider this one thousand and one.
Sorry Chuckles. Cliche or not, a truth is a truth.
1. Build Up Your Confidence.
Social pressures, the media, peer and parent pressure can make people uncomfortable about being single any time of the year. For some of us, being single is just no fun. The holiday season certainly seems to be designed for people already coupled up or for people with children, Being single at this time of the year can be a real test of your emotional strength and confidence.
The holiday season can definitely feel like it is working against you. While you are alone, it appears that just about everyone you meet or see has someone special to be with over the holidays. Ignore the hype. Put your plan into action to change your situation so that this year can be the last solo holiday season for you.
Remind yourself of your strengths and accomplishments. Write out the things about your life that you are proud of. What are the things that you want to do to better yourself and accomplish in the New Year? Make the time to make plans for your coming year.
Things to consider for a better New Year:
- Work/Career
- Relationships
- Family Life
- Personal Interests.
- Physical And Mental Health.
- Personal Growth and Development Targets That You Would Like To Reach.
- Money Goals
With a plan in place you will have what to look forward to and concentrate on beyond the holiday season instead of wasting your time dwelling on your FaceBook social status . Working from the plan that you put in place, you can start to develop and maintain a healthy sense of self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem leads directly to being more confident. Guess what? Being more confident makes it easier for you to meet new people and for you to be more interesting to those new people. Do you see where this is going or do we have to spell it out for you?
Fine. Here you go: People want to spend their time and be with other interesting people.
2. Take Charge Of Your Own Happiness.
Your life has value regardless of your social or marital status. Act happy and you’ll soon feel better. Yes, you may need to fake it for a while, but by acting on the suggestion in this article, you will not need to fake being happy for too long.
While you are at it, devote your time to meaningful activities and those good feelings will start to come naturally and endure. Binge-watching a TV or movie series on Netflix and playing video games during your free time will not improve your social life. You have to get your act together and get your butt in gear. If you want to meet someone, it starts with the right attitude that leads to taking the right actions. Keep reading.
3. Socialize More.
This point is Covid dependent, of course, but if you want to meet new people, you may need to get out more. No one will fall into your lap from out of nowhere. Accept those holiday party invitations or throw your own potluck gatherings and have your friends bring people that you may not know yet. You never know who you may meet.
- You may be more comfortable with a group activity like ice skating instead of making conversation at parties. Bring along a wingman if you’re hesitant to show up alone.
If physical gatherings are not possible check out social media groups and apps. It is guaranteed that you are not alone with being alone at this time of year. Join an online course that has a forum to talk with the other members from the course. You can learn something new and meet other people at the same time.
If you are not ready for those yet, at least learn more about them. Get yourself ready and have a plan for what you will do in the New Year.
4. Focus On Others.
If being single causes you distress, distract yourself by looking for ways to help others. Pass around the snacks at parties. Chat with people who are standing on the sidelines. Join the welcoming committee at your local professional association. Having something specific to do at an event will give you something to focus on and is a natural reason for you to interact with other people.
And, yes, wear that silly “Hello My Name Is” sticker. But add a funny comment to it or use your nickname from when you were a kid. If people are paying attention, conversations will start and connections can be made.
Volunteer at a local charity, food bank or soup kitchen. Helping people that are less fortunate than you will help to put your life and current situation in some perspective. There are many others that have it much worse than you. As bad as you may think your life is, it can always be worse. Helping others will distract you from your being alone and give you something beneficial and useful to do with your time.
While working with the other volunteers you expand the base of people that you know and this can lead to new friendships or who knows, with one of them or through the connections that you have made, you could even end up meeting a prospective date.
5. Dress Well And Keep Your Appearance Up.
When it comes down to it, there should be no doubt that who you are inside is what really matters but dressing well and maintaining your appearance plays a large role as well. Like it or not, first impressions count for a lot. If you are meeting new people, make that good first impression by looking presentable when doing so. Put your best foot forward by buying some new shoes, a new sweater or if the event calls for it, a new tie. We all feel a little better about ourselves when wearing something new that we like.
Shave or trim your facial hair, and wear clean pressed clothes.
Whatever the occasion is and however you are able to be involved in it, always dress one level up from what is standard or expected. You do want to stand out in a good way. If the event is a jeans casual event, the right sport coat goes well with a nice pair of jeans and in style shoes or boots. You can always dress down and take the jacket off once the event progresses.
Even if your are only able to join groups through video chats, looking good will come through, and not just in the image of you that people can see, but you will feel better about yourself and have some more confidence. This is, after all, what we are after here, feeling good from being confident.
Taking the time to take care of yourself shows people that even though you may be down right now, you are not out.
One other tip! If you are going into any video chat groups, before you do, check your screen and see what others will see of you from your camera. Of course you should look as good as you can yourself, but also, make sure that you have a neat and clean background behind you.
6. Pace Yourself, Cowboy.
The holidays can be a challenging time to start a new relationship. Most people are caught up in their own holiday drama that they have to deal with. Or, they just may be desperate to start a cuff relationship to get through the winter. In either case, go easy and do not jump too quickly into anything.
If you do meet someone that can be a potential partner – not just because they are available and looking to shack up for the season – but because they are actually someone that you would consider dating at any other time of the year, go slow. If it seems like they may be interested in you as well, find the right time and the right way to let them know that you are interested in them too. Don’t be shy. Strike while the iron is hot. See where it takes you. If it turns out that they are not interested in you, so be it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Keep on with your plan.
If you have recently started dating someone, but have only dated a few times, exchange modest but thoughtful and fun gifts. Gifting a book can show you care without being overwhelming. There is no need to buy anything expensive. Get creative and make a set of coupons for a hot chocolate or coffee date, a back rub and a foot massage. See where that gets you. It is okay to be a little flirtatious early in the relationship.
Holiday No-No’s! No Party Num-num’s!
A word of warning: Christmas is not the time to send or offer anyone selfies of yourself in various stages of undress. However, if your date sends some to you, then Merry Christmas!
Unless you have been in a long term relationship as tempting as it may be, do not profess your love to someone new during the holidays and new year. Just don’t. If things continue and go well, Valentines Day would be a better time for your love declaration to someone. But, even then, even on Valentines day, you may want to take it easy. The last thing that you want to do is tell someone that you love them, only to get the “deer in the headlights” stare in return.
Saying “I love you” too early in a relationship can come across like asking the question, “Do you love me?” If you are thinking about saying I love you to someone, you need to think about it like a good lawyer does. A good lawyer never asks a question that he does not already know the answer to. If you say I love you too early in the relationship and during the holiday time of year you may come across to the other person as being a little bit too needy. No one likes needy, at anytime of the year.
7. Look To The Future
If you play your cards right, even through you may not end up with a date for Christmas day or New Years eve, you will be consciously and productively working towards your future. Yes, being alone can suck, especially around the end of the year. It does not matter that you are alone, this season, because the real goal is to get you ready for the future.
By using the time to get your act together and think about things that you want and can do to improve your situation and, then, with having interesting things to say and offer in a conversation with other people, you increase the chances that you will not be alone at this time of year, next year.
Wishing and wanting to have someone in your life is not enough. Do what you need to do to raise your social value.
As in all things, chance favors the prepared. Be Prepared.
Conclusion
Singles And Couples.
Celebrate the holidays by spending more time with the people that you like and appreciate, and if possible, see if you can reach out to new people. Get involved. Do things. Get out of your usual routine and as much as possible and take some new avenues for spending your time.
Listen up Men. We need to lead the way.
Of course if your partner has some specific things that they would like to do with your time together, do them. But pleasantly surprise them. You need to come up with something fun and romantic to do for your holiday time together. Remember, romance starts long before you ever get to the bedroom.
For the single guys, you need to lead yourself out of the situation that you are in. Have a plan and work it. Get involved and expose yourself to new people and new situations.
If you haven’t already figured it out, your plan is about improving yourself, giving your life reason and meaning and not only about about finding someone. Finding someone may be what you want, and may be very important to you right now, but that someone else will want you to have a life of your own, first. So, get that life of your own. Work your plan.
Taking care of your relationships, romantic or otherwise, taking care of yourself, and becoming more involved with other people gives you more power and energy to strengthen your current relationships and just may create the new ones that you are looking for.
Whatever your current situation may be, you can light up your life this holiday season. And you just may end up with something to celebrate, all year long.
BAM! Be A Man. Do The Right Thing. Take Care Of Yourself And Your Relationships. Happy Holidays!
